


I can't say I'll be alright without you

by violetmessages



Category: Doctor Who, Torchwood
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Platonic Relationships, Post-Episode: s04e13 Journey's End, They're all friends, a lot of friendship, like a lot, slowburn martha/mickey
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-12 19:29:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28765605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetmessages/pseuds/violetmessages
Summary: In one timeline, Rose Tyler stays in a parallel universe with her parents and the Metacrisis Doctor, Martha and Mickey freelance their alien hunting careers, and Torchwood Three carries on in Cardiff until its untimely end.This is not that timeline.In which Martha, Mickey, Rose, and the Metacrisis Doctor join Torchwood Three after Journey's End and, along with Jack, Gwen, and Ianto, fight on behalf of the human race.
Relationships: Gwen Cooper/Rhys Williams, Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones, Martha Jones/Mickey Smith, Martha Jones/Thomas Milligan, Metacrisis Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler
Comments: 44
Kudos: 64





	1. In which everything ends, and begins again.

This was it. This was the life Rose thought she’d wanted for years. Her family beside her, the Doctor - one that could say _I love you_ to her - finally by her side, and nothing but the rest of her life ahead. It should have been perfect. It should have been what she wanted. 

It wasn’t.

Rose felt sick as she looked across to her mother, who was beaming. She watched as the Doctor said his stupid little speech about how the other Doctor could grow old with her, and she wondered if he even knew her at all. 

For months, she had done nothing but work to get back to her old universe, to travel with the Doctor, or at least go home - if nothing else. She loved Pete and Tony and how happy Mum was here. But it wasn’t home. There, there were all sorts of expectations, all kinds of pressure put on her to be _the Vitex Heiress,_ the leader of the Dimension cannon, the one everyone looked up to. The one who knew the Doctor and the one who could fix the stars going out. 

She didn’t want to be that person anymore. 

Rose Tyler wanted to travel with the Doctor again or at least go back home; catch up with Mickey and Jack, who were staying in the other universe; meet Martha, who seemed brilliant; and live her life in a way she never could here. She even had a Doctor who loved her and was willing to stay with her, grow old with her. 

“No,” she said, and caught the other Doctor’s eye, hoping he would understand what she wanted. “I don’t accept this.”

“You don’t want me?” the other Doctor asked, looking hurt. She quickly shook her head.

“No, no, I do. Very much!” said Rose frantically. “But I can’t stay here. I don’t want to.”

“What are you saying?” Mum asked, shocked and hurt. “Are you leaving again.”

“I’m sorry, Mum. But I don’t want to be here - in this universe. I want to go home,” said Rose. “With the other Doctor.”

“Rose, if you leave, you can never come back,” said her Doctor, the original one. “You’ll never see your parents again. You’ll never see Tony.”

“Are you willing to do that?” asked Donna. 

“I know,” said Rose, tearfully. “But this isn’t my home.”

“Oh, Rose,” cried Mum. But Rose wasn’t listening to her. 

“Will you come with me?” she asked the other Doctor, her breath hitching in her throat. “Will you stay?”

“Rose, I’d follow you to the ends of the universe,” said the other Doctor, looking very serious. 

“He can’t travel with us - me,” the Doctor said, looking at them gravely. “I won’t have him on the TARDIS.”

“Just drop us off where you dropped Jack and Mickey off,” said Rose. 

So she wouldn’t be able to travel with him anymore. That was fine, truly. She wasn’t the same nineteen-year-old that had skipped away with him on a whim, who had treated Mickey horribly, and who had no clear idea of the future. She still didn’t, but the one thing that she did know was that she wasn’t leaving this other Doctor alone. Not now, not ever. 

“Fine,” said the Doctor, gesturing to his TARDIS. “Get in.”

The other Doctor walked inside, followed by the original Doctor and Donna, but Rose turned to her mother, who had tears in her eyes, and smiled sadly. 

“Bye, Mum,” she said, already tearing up. Her mum didn’t respond; she just pulled her in close and held her tightly. Rose sniffled and hugged back, feeling wetness on her shoulder. When her mum let go, both of their faces were tearstained. 

“You keep out of trouble, you hear,” Mum said, wiping tears off her face. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she cried, and gave her mum a final kiss on the cheek. Then, with a deep breath, she walked into the TARDIS, leaving what remained of her old life behind her. 

The TARDIS’s interiors always managed to calm her down. The iridescent blue of the center console made the highlights of the two Doctors’ and Donna’s faces gleam teal, and the contrast of the bright center with the rusty, copper walls made her feel at peace. She knew, in her heart, that the peace was not going to last and that she would soon leave it, but it didn’t stop her from relishing in it. 

“Ready?” the original Doctor asked. She nodded, and he and Donna ping-ponged around the center console, slapping buttons and pulling levers haphazardly. She noticed, with a start, that the other Doctor, her Doctor, wasn’t touching it at all. 

The TARDIS began to rumble, shaking wildly, and she grabbed onto something to keep her steady. She heard the whooshing sound, the one that made her heart leap out of her chest, and then a thump. They had landed. 

“Here’s your stop,” said the Doctor, looking expectantly at the two of them. “Try not to commit genocide.”

“I _had_ to. It was a matter of life or death, for the whole universe!” Her Doctor glared at the other, and before they could start arguing, she held up her hand. 

“Stop,” she demanded. “This is not how I want to leave things.”

“Rose, he-”

“-No,” she said. “I’m going out there, with him, and we’re not going to end on a sour note.”

To his credit, the Doctor did shut up, and from outside, came a frantic knocking on the door of the TARDIS. She ignored it.

“I’m going to miss you,” Rose continued. “I don’t want you to drop me off here and never see me again.”

“Good thing I have a phone number now,” he smiled at her. “Get it off, Martha. Oh, you’ll love Martha - she’s brilliant. She’s a doctor, she works for UNIT, she-”

“Doctor,” Rose interrupted him. “I’ll get it from her. And when I call, you have to come. Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Bye, Doctor,” she said, fighting back the urge to cry. This wasn’t an ending, she reminded herself. This was a beginning. Reaching out, she grasped her Doctor’s hand. 

“Goodbye.” smiled Donna. She gave her a fond look back. 

“Bye,” the original Doctor said, looking at her with a strange mixture of affection and love and regret in his eyes. She kept his gaze for a moment, a long moment, filled with memories and what-could-have-beens. 

Then she turned away, breathing deeply, hand still holding her Doctor’s, and opened the TARDIS door. On the outside was Jack, knocking on the door, with Martha and Mickey behind him. 

“Doct - oh, Rose?” Jack said, confused. “What are you doing here? Is there something wrong?”

“Are the Daleks back?” asked Martha, looking worried. 

“Nope,” Rose said, pasting on a smile. “Me and this one here are going to stay in this universe.”

She stepped neatly outside, followed by her Doctor, who was holding her hand, and then closed the door. Within seconds, the TARDIS disappeared again, a whooshing noise left in its midst, until there was nothing left but silence. 

“You’re going to stay?” asked Mickey, still confused. “But what about Jackie and-”

“-It wasn’t my home,” Rose explained. “And I was hoping that one of you could help us, since I think I’m legally dead, and the Doctor doesn’t technically exist.”

“Technically, I didn’t exist until today,” her Doctor smiles sheepishly. “But, if it helps, I’ve got all of Donna’s memories and skills, so me and her are tied for best temp in Chiswick.”

“So, you both are going to stay here?” Mickey asked. “On Earth?”

“Nowhere else to go,” the Doctor smiled. “I’m human, and I don’t have a TARDIS.”

“And we want to be here,” Rose elaborated. “Although, we probably should have thought this through more. We don’t really have money, or a job, or-”

“Well, Rose, Doctor,” Jack cut her off. “How would you like to work for me. For Torchwood.”

“Isn’t Torchwood-?”

“-I changed it,” said Jack, looking earnestly. “It’s different now. We protect Cardiff and fight on behalf of the human race. After all, the twenty-first century is where everything changes.”

“They have a nice sewer of a base,” Martha joked. 

“Oi!” Jack said. “And to think, I was going to offer you and Mickey Mouse over there a job as well. I don’t like you hanging out around UNIT.”

“I didn’t say I didn’t like it.” Martha laughed, and Rose looked at her, this woman that both Jack and the Doctor seemed to love so much, a brilliant woman, and felt a sort of love for, even if she didn’t know her at all. Of course Jack would love her; she seemed wonderful. And Jack. She wanted to hug him and talk to him so badly. She thought he was _dead_. 

She hadn’t seen Jack in so long, and he’d changed so much - she could see it in his eyes. 

“Well?” Jack asked. “Do the four of you want to work for me.”

Rose looked at the Doctor, raising her eyebrows. He looked back, just as eager as she was, and she knew her decision. 

“Well, I’m going to regret this,” Mickey started to say. “But I’m saying yes.”

“Martha?” Jack asked, looking at her expectantly. Rose smiled at the expression on his face. 

“I-”

“-Come on,” pleaded Jack. “You know you’ll be happier with us.”

“Oh, alright,” Martha said, and Jack latched himself to her, lifting her up slightly. “Jack!”

He let go of her and looked at Rose and the Doctor, looking at the both of them hopefully, but almost like he was ready to be rejected. 

“We are too,” said Rose, smiling widely at Jack. He grinned back and swept both her and the Doctor into a big hug, almost lifting her off her feet. 

“Hey you two,” Jack said, muffled into their shoulders. “Come join us. Don’t be shy.”

Rose felt someone wrap around her side, and she wrenched her hand from Jack’s waist and wrapped it around them, realizing that it was Martha. She smelled nice, like flowers, even if she’d been through a Dalek battle. 

“Oh, wait till you meet Ianto and Gwen,” Jack said after he’d finally let go of all four of them. “You’ll love them. They’re amazing.”

“Gwen, the one from an old Cardiff family,” the Doctor said, perking up. “Spatial genetic multiplicity!”

“I’d better call them,” Jack said, and pulled out a phone. He dialed a few numbers and held it to his ear. 

“Ianto, I’m in London,” he said after a second. “I’m bringing home some guests. Well, they aren’t guests, more like - new employees.”

“Ianto’s great,” said Martha to them, as Jack walked slightly away, still talking to the phone. “And you’re Rose. I’m glad I finally got to meet you.”

“Me too.” Rose grinned. “The Doctor says you’re brilliant.”

“She is,” the Doctor says, looking at her affectionately. “She’s the best doctor out there.”

Martha smiled, looking a bit embarrassed, then reached out and tugged his hand. “So, you’re human then?”

“Yup,” he said. “One heart, only one life. I’d say that makes me pretty human.”

“Well, come over here and let me check you over quickly,” Martha said. “I don’t want you collapsing on me because you only have one heart.”

“I’m not going to,” the Doctor said, instantly. But he let her lead him over to the side, sitting down next to her on a park bench some distance away. Rose supposed she wanted to have a private conversation with him. 

“Are you going to be okay?” asked Mickey, coming up next to her, looking at Martha and the Doctor on the park bench. 

“You did it,” Rose reminded him, desperately trying to ignore the hot tears pooling in her eyes, willing them to stay put because she’d done far too much crying already. “You were in a parallel universe alone.”

“Yeah, but I had my Gran,” Mickey said, turning to look at her, concern dripping from his eyes. “I mean, you’ve just lost everyone.”

“Not everyone,” she managed to say without sniffing. “I’ve got the Doctor and Jack. And, I’ve got you.”

She gave into her impulses and hugged Mickey. He hugged her back, and it was like the days back before the Doctor, back on the Powell Estate, when they were kids and it was just them against the world. 

“I’ve got you, right?” she gasped into his shoulder, getting his shirt wet. 

“Of course you do,” he said, rubbing her back. “Remember that night that we got drunk with Jake and thought we’d figured out how to make a TARDIS?”

“Yeah,” she said, sniffling. 

“Do you remember what I said?” asked Mickey. “I said that even though I didn’t love you like that anymore, we’re still best mates. And we are.”

Rose didn’t answer. She just hugged him for a little bit, thankful for him. She hadn’t always been good to him. There were times when she’d been outright rude, dismissive, and mean, and he still loved her. Mickey was a good man, a better person than she. And Rose was so lucky to have him in her life. 

“Hey, what’s this?” came Jack’s voice, and she let go of Mickey to stare at him. “Don’t I get a hug too?”

“Oh, Jack,” said Rose, and pulled at him, hugging him fiercely. “I thought you were dead!”

“It’s a long story. One that I’ll probably be able to tell you soon, because I have good news and bad news.”

“Bad news first,” said the Doctor, arriving arm in arm with Martha from the side. 

“Well, the bad news is that we’ll have to take a train back to Cardiff, since the Doctor couldn’t be bothered to drop us off there,” Jack said, rolling his eyes a little. 

“And what’s the good news?” asked Martha. 

“Well, the good news is that you’ll soon be able to meet Ianto and Gwen. And that they’re both safe and in the Hub,” said Jack. “They’re cleaning it up now. So, we'd better get going if we're going to catch that train!”


	2. In which Martha has a crisis, the Doctor debates morality, and Jack gets closure

Martha boarded the train, following an overexcited Jack, the human version of the man she loved - just not like _that_ anymore, and two people she did not know. 

Well, it was probably wrong to say she didn’t know who Rose was. Of course she did; she used to compare herself to her, get sad on her behalf, and even at one point resented her for being who the Doctor wanted because it certainly wasn’t her. 

Rose did, in fact, live up to her reputation. Martha could see immediately why the Doctor liked her. She was smart, brave, friendly, and, if she was being honest, hot. That was obviously true. And Jack obviously loved her because from the moment they started walking to the train station, Jack and Rose had held hands and started to tease each other about everything and anything. 

She sat down between Mickey Smith, who had a very friendly smile, and the Doctor, who was twitching in his seat. In front of her were Jack and Rose, the former telling an outrageous story she’d heard before about a party he’d been to on Solaxis Three. 

She pulled out her phone and wondered if she should call Tom before remembering that she wouldn’t get through until next week. That was the hard part about dating someone who worked in an entirely different country, one that didn’t have as many cell towers as might be nice - you never knew when you could speak to them next.

Not that Tom would mind that she’d switched jobs. Cardiff was just as close as New York to him, and he’d be happier that she was doing something she thought was more worthwhile. She slipped the phone back into her pocket, and it hit something metallic. Martha reached in and felt it, then shuddered. 

There, sitting as innocuous as could possibly be, sat the object that she had almost used to commit genocide. The Osterhagen Key sat heavily in her pocket, almost like it was sinking down to the floor. That feeling, that sinking feeling that she felt when she almost killed the world-

The Doctor placed a hand over her own, almost like he could tell what she was thinking. She turned to look at him, and he waggled his eyebrows, sending her into laughter. 

“What’s funny?” Rose asked, smiling widely. “Is he being an idiot?”

“Oi!” the Doctor complained, rolling his eyes. “Who’s got the ape brain?”

“You do,” said Mickey, laughing. “You’re human now, right?”

The Doctor stared at him for what seemed like ages, eyes blank. “Oh, you’re right,” he finally said. “ _I’ve_ got the ape brain.”

Martha laughed at the expression on his face, and soon, the other three joined her, readily teasing him. 

“I’m not fully human though,” said the Doctor triumphantly. “I’ve got one heart, but I’ve still got a colossal brain, so take that.”

“Wonder what else he’s got that’s colossal,” Jack muttered under his breath. Mickey let out a snort, and Martha met eyes with Rose, who was similarly trying her best not to burst out laughing. 

“I’ll try it out and let you know,” Rose muttered back, and Martha outwardly laughed at the expression on her face, covering her mouth with her hands. The Doctor gave them all a curious look, and it made Martha want to laugh even more. 

“So,” Rose said after they’d all calmed down a little. “Tell me then. How’d you end up here? I thought you were dead.”

At this, she stared accusingly at the Doctor, who bit his lip and looked a little nervous. 

“I - he - we lied,” said the Doctor, looking quite remorseful. “Being around him - Jack made the other Doctor feel-”

“-He said I felt wrong,” said Jack, looking almost empty. “He said he left me behind because I was wrong.”

Martha sensed that this was a conversation that she wasn’t necessarily supposed to be in on. As much as she and Jack were friends, very good friends even, this felt like a conversation that she wasn’t supposed to hear. She met eyes with Mickey, another person who was similarly not involved in the Jack-Doctor abandonment, one that she knew had given Jack several issues, and raised her eyebrows. He gave her an expression she recognized. 

_I don’t know how to exit this conversation._

Still, Jack had broached the subject here, in front of her and the rest of them, which meant he at least trusted them enough. Enough to talk about it openly, or as openly as he would. 

“I’m sorry,” said the Doctor. “I - he - we should have never abandoned you. And he - we never apologized for it either. When we woke up, all we could feel was wrongness around, and we just left because we were regenerating. But we should have gone back for you, or explained, or done something, and we didn’t.”

“What do you mean, wrong?” Rose asked, eyes darting from Jack to the Doctor. “There’s nothing wrong with Jack.”

“How much do you remember when you looked into the TARDIS?” asked the Doctor. 

“Not much, why?”

“Because you brought Jack back to life,” explained the Doctor. “Only, you brought him back to life a little too much.”

“I can’t die,” said Jack, a little sadly. “And there’s no way to fix it.”

“Isn’t that - good?” asked Mickey, haltingly. 

“You would think,” said Jack, smiling sadly. “Immortality isn’t just not dying. It’s watching everyone else, especially everyone you love, die instead. 

“You mean, I caused this?” asked Rose, looking horrified. “I did this to you.”

“No,” said Jack firmly. “You didn’t. You were just the conduit for the power. This is not your fault.”

“But I’m the one that brought you back and _condemned_ you to this life,” Rose cried out, looking teary-eyed. “This is my fault.”

“Absolutely not,” said Jack, pulling her close to kiss on the forehead. “Come on, let’s take a walk.”

And he pulled her up, and they both left, walking down the aisle. Martha guessed that he needed to comfort her in private, and since the rest of the train car was empty - the Earth moving probably had something to do with it - Jack and Rose could talk without fear of being overheard. 

She leaned back, put her hands into her pockets, and immediately froze. There, once again, she felt the press of the Key against her palm, and she shuddered. 

What had she almost done? 

She pulled it out to stare at this time, the Key that had almost destroyed the world, the Key that she had promised to destroy herself. She had been given authority over it, she was the highest ranking officer, and she had almost destroyed the world. She began to shake, and Mickey looked at her, slightly worried. 

“Oh, Martha,” said the Doctor, face dripping with sympathy. 

“I’m sorry,” she choked out before squeezing the Key firmly in her hand, hard enough to leave marks and dents. “I don’t know why I’m feeling like this.”

“I do,” the Doctor said, looking very grave. “I think I’m the only person who might be able to understand.”

Of course. The Doctor had destroyed his planet to save the world from Daleks, and Martha had almost done the same thing. It was the same;they were the same. Martha had once felt pity for the Doctor when he explained, but now she understood as much as she ever could.

“I’ll let you two talk,” said Mickey, getting up to move to the other side of the train car. He seemed like a good man. 

“I would have done it,” whispered Martha. “Without flinching. Does that make me a bad person?”

“I did it,” the Doctor responded. “Technically, he did it - but, seeing as I’m an instantaneous biological metacrisis, I would say that I did it too. I’m the same man, but with a few genetic differences.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” said Martha. “He didn’t either, not really. I guess you are the same.”

“I never considered myself a good person,” said the Doctor. “And perhaps you won’t be able to forgive yourself either. But to me, you’re the best person I know.”

“I did say I was good,” said Martha, laughing humorlessly. “You’re right though. I don’t know if I’ll be able to live with myself - now that I know I would have done it.”

“You don’t have to do it alone,” said the Doctor, and he grabbed her hand and squeezed. “You’re not alone; you’ve got so many people around you that love you.”

“How do you live with yourself?” asked Martha desperately. A sort of panic arose, tightening her chest, shortening her breath, choking her lungs. “You must know.”

“I find people to surround myself with,” he said, finally. “People who can and will stop me. People who can and will remind you that you are a better person than you believe yourself to be.”

Martha smiled, a sort of wet, half sad, half happy smile, and wrapped herself around the Doctor, a man who had simultaneously ruined her life and made it so much better. She would have been happy as a doctor in her own right, but seeing things that she never could have imagined, visiting worlds she never could have - it changed her. 

She wasn’t sure if it was for the better, but he was right. She wasn’t alone. 

“Thanks, Doctor,” Martha said into his shoulder. 

“Thank _you_ , Doctor,” he riffed back. “Martha Jones, savior of the Earth, yet again. I’ve got a lot to measure up to.”

Martha snorted, although she was pleasantly flattered. “I can’t believe that you’re going to stay in one place. You went mad in 1969.”

“I’m different now,” he responded, clacking his tongue. “A new kind of man. New Doctor, new suit - do you think I should have a new name as well?”

“Oh, you’ll probably need one,” Martha said, brushing the lapels of his blue suit. “You can’t go around with _Doctor_ on your passport and driver's license, can you?”

“Well, I could go with John Smith,” the Doctor thought out loud. “But that’s so _boring;_ I’m all sorts of new now. I could be Alonso - I’ve always wanted to be an Alonso.”

“Alonso?” she said, twisting up her nose. “That’s the name you want?”

“Well, I could be a James or a Jack - no, never mind, one Jack is enough - or what about a Charlotte or an Edward? Or even a Corin?” He rambled on, getting very excited. “Oh, there are so many names out there for me to choose from - how do you humans do it?”

“I’ll get you a baby naming book when we get to Cardiff.” Martha grinned. “We can go through names together, as a group.”

The train jerked to a halt, and Martha got up to her feet to see that Rose, Jack, and Mickey were all heading towards them. She pulled the Doctor up, and he gave her a confused look. 

“We’re here.” Martha laughed. “Time to get off the train.”

“You can all meet Gwen and Ianto,” Jack said, looking ecstatic. “Come on, I think they’re waiting for us outside.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise Gwen and Ianto will show up in the next chapter! I hope you enjoyed!


	3. In which Ianto does some sweeping, Gwen is a supportive friend, and the team finally meet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw: disassociation

Ianto pulled out a set of brooms, and Gwen grimaced, giving him a disgusted look. He laughed and handed it to her. 

“I refuse to clean this by myself,” he said, holding out the edge of the broomstick to her.

“Why are we cleaning when we could just, I don’t know, shove it off to Jack?” Gwen complained. “It’s not our mess!”

“Jack won’t do a thing, and you know that,” said Ianto grimacing. “Do you really want to walk over piles of rubble every time you come into work?”

“He lives here,” muttered Gwen as she grabbed the broom angrily. 

“Unfortunately,” replied Ianto, and followed Gwen as she stalked away. Sometimes Ianto wondered how Jack had managed to live on his own for years when he had trouble doing the easiest of tasks, like throwing out empty pizza boxes or stacking pens back in their proper place after using them. Ianto was sure he’d picked up hundreds of cheap pens off the floor of Jack’s office - he had a propensity to just drop them once he was done with his task. 

Trudging, they reached the main base of the Hub, where there were papers strewn everywhere, little shattered electronics and mechanical parts and, of course, the shattered remains of a Dalek. It had appeared after Tosh’s time lock had shut down, right before the Earth had started to shake again. Ianto turned away and tried very hard not to look at it. 

It was fine when they were in the action, in the melee, when it was more important to be focusing on the problem at hand. He could deal, compartmentalize more easily - time to save the world, time to support Jack, time to make sure that they - or at least Gwen - made it out of there alive. But afterwards -

He put it out of his mind and started to sweep up the little fragments of metal and glass and papers that had fallen down. He tried to pay attention only to the methodical strokes of the brush against the ground, the noise that it made when it scraped across the floor, and counted the number of them that he had made. After a while, he didn’t even notice anything - the world seemed to float away, and he felt floaty - almost like he wasn’t even there.

“Ianto!” Gwen’s voice came, and it broke him out of his dazed sweeping. “Ianto!”

“Oh, yes, Gwen? Do you need something?” his voice came out of his body. Strange, he hadn’t even noticed doing it. 

“Ianto, are you alright?” she asked. 

Her voice felt light and airy, almost like it was coming from someplace else. He looked down and saw two hands gripping a broomstick. They looked odd. They must be his; whose else could they be? They didn’t look like Gwen’s. 

“Ianto, come with me, come sit down,” came Gwen’s voice again, and suddenly the world was shifting, the Hub was moving, and he was facing somewhere else. The moving stopped. 

“Ianto,” came Gwen’s voice again, which now sounded sharp and scared. He wanted to reach out to her, comfort her, make sure she was alright, but he couldn’t exactly seem to do that. The two foreign hands on his lap, ones that he was sure were his, but didn’t feel like his, clasped Gwen’s. 

“I’m fine,” his voice said. “I-”

“You haven’t spoken in over thirty minutes,” said Gwen, using her concerned voice. “Your eyes looked glazed over. You wouldn’t respond to anything for a while.”

“I’m-” he started to say, when his phone rang. Those hands that were his but didn’t feel like his went to pick it up, and he flipped it open. 

“Ianto, I’m in London,” Jack’s voice said. “I’m bringing home some guests. Well, they aren’t guests, more like - new employees.”

“Employees?” he asked. 

“Yup,” Jack said jovially. “You already know Martha, but I’ll introduce the rest of them when I get here!”

“Is it Jack?” asked Gwen. 

“Yes,” he said after a second, and put the phone on speaker. 

“Jack, where are you?” asked Gwen. “Is everything sorted? Are we-”

“We’re all fine,” Jack said, sounding very happy. “I’m in London - you think you and Ianto’ll be able to drive here and pick us up?”

Ianto moved to say yes, but Gwen beat him to it.

“I don’t think so,” she said. “We’ve got loads to do here - the Hub’s a mess, and I don’t think either of us are in any condition to drive.”

“What do you mean?” asked Jack, urgently. “Are you hurt? Are you safe? You didn’t say anything when the Doctor-”

“-We’re  _ fine, _ ” Gwen cut him off. “It’s just that we’re tired, and Ianto-”

She paused as Ianto quickly shook his head and glared at her.

“Ianto’s what?” demanded Jack. 

“I’m fine,” he lied. “I’m just tired too. Don’t want to drive the SUV off the road. There’s a train soon; you can probably catch that.”

“Fine,” said Jack, and Ianto could hear him rolling his eyes through the phone. “I’ll be there soon. Keep yourselves out of trouble.”

“Shouldn’t we be telling you that?” Gwen joked. 

“Bye kids.” Jack laughed and hung up. Ianto placed his phone back into his pocket and made a motion to get up, when Gwen clung onto his arm and pulled him back down. 

“What’s going on?” she demanded. “I just lied to Jack for you; please tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing,” he said, and she made a disbelieving noise. 

“It’s not nothing,” she said. “So either tell me or I’ll call Jack and tell him that you’re  _ not  _ fine.”

“He’ll worry,” said Ianto. “Don’t tell him.”

“Then tell me,” she said, looking at him with concerned eyes. “You don’t have to go through everything alone, you know. Please, I just want to help.”

He sighed and slumped his shoulders. “I was thinking about the last time I saw them,” he confessed. “The Daleks.”

_ The air was smokey and acrid; he could barely see anything in front of him, and he ran through the hallways clawing past the running people, fleeing from anything that looked metallic. All around him, he could hear the screams, the stomping of boots, the cries of people right before they were killed. There were bodies all around him, and he kept going, kept running, fleeing from the Cybermen and the other thing, the other beings that demanded in their robotic voice. _

_ Exterminate. _

_ Running, running, running, as fast as he could, as far away as he could, clawing past to find her, find the person he loved the most, find Lisa and run away with her, run to safety with her but not without her. How could he go on if she was one of the many bodies that littered the hallways of Torchwood One- _

“Ianto!” Gwen’s voice rang out, panicked. “Ianto, please, can you hear me?"

“Sorry,” he panted. He felt like he’d run a thousand miles. “I’m sorry.”

“Oh, god,” said Gwen, and hugged him, wrapped her arms around him. He settled his head in the crook of her neck and felt her reassuring heartbeat, the one that reminded him that she was still alive, she wasn’t hurt. 

“I was thinking about Canary Wharf,” he whispered, and she hugged him tighter. “They were there. Seeing them again - it made it seem like it happened today.”

“I’m sorry,” whispered Gwen, and hugged him even harder. 

“What are you sorry about?” he asked. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” she said. “I’m so sorry.”

They didn’t speak for a while after that. Ianto leaned his head against Gwen’s shoulder, and she had her arms around him, reticent to let go. It was peaceful, probably the kind of thing that Ianto should have done from the beginning. The small clock on the wall ticked as Ianto slowly floated back down to reality, until he could feel himself in his body again, recognizing his limbs as his own. 

“I’m better now,” he said, and slowly raised his head off her shoulder. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me,” said Gwen, releasing him. She carded through his hair, seemingly removing bits of dust and fluff that had settled in it, then gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“I am now,” he said, and gave her a big smile. “Really, I’m sure. What time is it?”

“It’s been about an hour since we last talked to Jack,” said Gwen. “Maybe longer. We’ve been sitting here for a while.”

Ianto frowned, feeling slightly guilty for making Gwen sit there with him. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have made you sit here this long.”

“Don’t apologize,” she chided. “Anyway, I think I needed the break too. I think Jack should be here soon.”

Right as Gwen said that, the door alarms rang, and they both got up to their feet. In strode in Jack, and Ianto watched as his eyes widened at the burnt-out Dalek in the entrance. 

“Ianto, Gwen!” he shouted, scanning over the place. When he spotted them, he ran over to them, looking panicked. “Are you alright?”

“We’re fine,” Ianto said. 

Jack didn’t seem to care. Once he reached them, he pulled the both of them in for a long hug, crushing them against his chest, and made a valiant effort to lift them both off the ground. Ianto wrapped one of his around Gwen and the other around Jack and rested his head on the side of Jack’s neck, where it met his shoulder. He breathed in the reassuring scent of Jack, one that seemed to never change, and also smelled something a little foul, like the scent of smoke. 

“You can’t lift us both,” Gwen said, laughing, as Jack tried again. “Especially not Ianto.”

“I’m strong enough,” complained Jack, and let them both go. He cupped their cheeks and pulled them in to kiss them both on their foreheads. “You’re safe; you’re not hurt, right?”

“We’re not hurt,” repeated Ianto. “Where’s Martha and the other guests you said you were bringing.”

“Guests?” Gwen asked. 

“Employees,” Jack clarified. “I left them on the Plass. Thought I’d check up on you first, then bring them in through the scenic entrance. This place doesn’t look too neat, though.”

“Why don’t you pick up a broom so we process everything first?” Gwen muttered, and Jack gave her a sharp look.

“You said you were fine,” said Jack. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“I’ll tell you later,” said Ianto. “I promise. Now, go get them. I’m sure they’re tired of waiting.”

“Fine,” said Jack, and released them both. “I want to know if you’re okay, I want to know the truth. Don’t lie to me about this sort of thing.  _ Please. _ ”

“I won’t,” Ianto promised. “Go get them.”

Jack turned and ran out. Ianto turned to Gwen and raised an eyebrow, which she countered with a sharp look. Realizing he couldn't win, he turned to look towards the Invisalift. He felt Gwen’s hand slide into his and smiled. 

The lift descended, and he could make out five people. He frowned, looking on as it descended. 

“What’s the weight capacity?” muttered Gwen. “How many people can you fit on that thing before it collapses?”

He snickered, and the lift stopped. In front of them were Jack, Martha, the Doctor, and two people he’d never met before. Why was the Doctor here?

“Guys, this is Gwen and Ianto,” said Jack, proudly. “Gwen’s my second-in-command, she’s got a heart bigger than the Mariana Trench, and she’s a damn good copper too.”

“Ex-copper,” corrected Gwen. “I’ll thank you to remember.”

Jack laughed and turned to face him. “And this is Ianto Jones. He’s my-” At this, Jack paused, seemingly at a loss for words. “My right hand. He keeps us all fed, watered, alive, and looks good in a suit while he does it.”

“Careful, sir,” he said, mimicking the words he’d said on Gwen’s first day. “That’s harassment.”

“You love it when I harass you.” Jack smirked. 

“Try again after office hours,” Ianto countered, trying to keep a straight face. 

“Boys,” Gwen said, rolling her eyes. “Aren’t you going to introduce them?”

“Right,” said Jack. “This is Mickey, Rose, and the Doctor - except not quite. And you know Martha.”

“Nice to meet you,” said Gwen, smiling. “What do you mean, not quite?”

“Well, it’s complicated,” said the Doctor, except not quite. “I’m a biological metacrisis, which means-”

“-You could always explain while we clean,” interrupted Ianto. “The Hub’s a mess, and what better way to start off working here than cleaning?”

Jack made a face, and Gwen and the blond woman, Rose presumably, started to laugh at him. 

“You look like someone pissed in your breakfast.” Rose laughed. “Don’t like cleaning?”

“Never does it,” Ianto said. “If I wasn’t a better man, I would let him do it by himself.”

“Hey!” Jack complained, and the sight sent all six of them into a laughing fit. “I’m not that bad!”

“Yes, you are,” Gwen laughed. “Come on then. I want to get home on time for once!”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my big, indulgent post-Journey's End fic with friendship, bonding, and more friendship! This work will be updated periodically, but there is no set schedule in place for now. A big thank you to Nik for the beta and thank you for reading! Kudos/Comments are appreciated!
> 
> Find me on tumblr [here](https://violetmessages.tumblr.com/)


End file.
